Eating okay-ly then offsetting all the healthiness by bingeing on junk food displayed publicly on the coffee table. Idk what to call it; impulse or abuse or both but either way it really irks me
I don't feel like I'm doing/ have done anything right today honestly. I felt like I shouldn't have gone to school today
Like I shouldn't think about the team if I didn't meet Ket, but-.
Shouldn't have known about a distant someone's passing. & if it would soon hit hard at me which I can't bear to deal with now. And I stupidly wore the half u, just being rly glad I'm seriously out of it
Tues • Thurs
I need time but doesn't everybody
And hweems was hurt again
So I think our lives are somewhat receiving a common signal from the parallel world
Same emotions and all
My feet hurt when I walk about in class then I'd be such a slacker if I sit down during lesson time
Tired of answering tough qns from kids sorry
(Idk what they learn in secondary sch history lessons) (idk what is radioactivity) (idk about outer space but I'll try to search for you)
And having a good impression of person A being completely and utterly shattered like you're living an illusion your whole entire life is super duperrrrrrr shockinggggggggg
But poor thing Jo bought two denim jackets and bren has to wear sexy Chinese oriental outfit for work
I wna be flying all day everyday so I can visit her ✈✈✈✈✈
Bad move Rebecca you got off early from work for one day and look what an emotional tangle you're in now
Monday, January 28, 2013
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Growing up
School really doesn't prepare us for the life up ahead. In school there's only one criterion; ace everything. But in life, to build strong unfailing relationships, perseverance to rise after a fall, lots of tolerance, social responsibility.
Mainly a heck load of responsibilities.
Ok but true that to ace everything, there's always the little pocket of good traits that we must have, like perseverance.
Idk the point to this post but hi
Mainly a heck load of responsibilities.
Ok but true that to ace everything, there's always the little pocket of good traits that we must have, like perseverance.
Idk the point to this post but hi
Friday, January 25, 2013
You're fired
Thankfully these few days / weeks have passed by such that I worry more about my students than anything else. I can finally wake up with a lighter heart and not dread stepping into bishan int at exactly 6.45. I would rather this than anything else right now
Today I learnt of a slightly disappointing nugget of info; social status is ubiquitous wherever there are human beings and it happens no matter how many days have passed on this earth. I didn't know the class would deliberately taunt Boy A, saying things that are not directly hurtful, but chanting things that would make him personally upset. I know I have in my possession the authority to stop this, but the ironic thing is that the others are perfect model students in class, and just so happens that Boy A is the opposite of that. He can't help himself
I was having my dried and wrinkly food when Boy A sat beside me and said he wanted to 'fire' Boy B from being a friend because B didn't show his drawings to A. He said it with anger and hatred at first, his voice reflected the pent up frustrations in the depths of his heart and I understood. I didn't take it seriously because I had a feeling this was merely a phase of his and it would pass.
Then he punched his fists against the table and buried his face in his arms, exclaiming some words I couldn't pick out. He teared and said he was lonely because nobody wanted to sit with him and that really shattered me.
I think I had the old immature way of thinking, but it didn't strike me at all that someone whom I've never seen having a close group of friends would lament that they were lonely and needed somebody to be there for them. I told him I was there with him, sitting with him now. And before his eyes could lose it's shine from the tears, he said he was going to sit with Boy C, a random classmate who had been sitting alone at another table.
My class kids still intrigue me w their idiosyncrasies. Every one of them is just so vastly different in their personality and mannerisms. I cannot channel anger at them if they're not focusing in class because they won't pull up their socks and resolve to work harder next time. And a little part of me withers when I try to strike up a conversation w them but they don't give off the same level of enthusiasm as I, etc. I shouldn't feel that way. Always making the same mental note; don't be inflamed w emotions with Sandalwood.
I love all of them in my class, regrettably some more than others. I talk to the naughtier, more restless ones more because of the copious amounts of prompting that happen within the classroom and I must say they really make my day there a whole lot more challenging yet wholesome.
Back to the topic; I've tried reassuring Boy A to tell me if the others are bullying him again or making him uncomfortable and that I'd do something about it. But my words fall on uninterested ears once again.
Today I learnt of a slightly disappointing nugget of info; social status is ubiquitous wherever there are human beings and it happens no matter how many days have passed on this earth. I didn't know the class would deliberately taunt Boy A, saying things that are not directly hurtful, but chanting things that would make him personally upset. I know I have in my possession the authority to stop this, but the ironic thing is that the others are perfect model students in class, and just so happens that Boy A is the opposite of that. He can't help himself
I was having my dried and wrinkly food when Boy A sat beside me and said he wanted to 'fire' Boy B from being a friend because B didn't show his drawings to A. He said it with anger and hatred at first, his voice reflected the pent up frustrations in the depths of his heart and I understood. I didn't take it seriously because I had a feeling this was merely a phase of his and it would pass.
Then he punched his fists against the table and buried his face in his arms, exclaiming some words I couldn't pick out. He teared and said he was lonely because nobody wanted to sit with him and that really shattered me.
I think I had the old immature way of thinking, but it didn't strike me at all that someone whom I've never seen having a close group of friends would lament that they were lonely and needed somebody to be there for them. I told him I was there with him, sitting with him now. And before his eyes could lose it's shine from the tears, he said he was going to sit with Boy C, a random classmate who had been sitting alone at another table.
My class kids still intrigue me w their idiosyncrasies. Every one of them is just so vastly different in their personality and mannerisms. I cannot channel anger at them if they're not focusing in class because they won't pull up their socks and resolve to work harder next time. And a little part of me withers when I try to strike up a conversation w them but they don't give off the same level of enthusiasm as I, etc. I shouldn't feel that way. Always making the same mental note; don't be inflamed w emotions with Sandalwood.
I love all of them in my class, regrettably some more than others. I talk to the naughtier, more restless ones more because of the copious amounts of prompting that happen within the classroom and I must say they really make my day there a whole lot more challenging yet wholesome.
Back to the topic; I've tried reassuring Boy A to tell me if the others are bullying him again or making him uncomfortable and that I'd do something about it. But my words fall on uninterested ears once again.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
anew
It feels humbling to know that people humble themselves and care not so much for their self worth but of their friendships instead. Luckily I happen to know one of those people; hopefully throughout the course of this life, things will get better..?
Happy birthday Paige!!
• table manners was really cute and we were talking about timbre when I heard live music playing from outside the cafe when we walked out; amazing how changi city point manages to fit cool things into one accessible area
• best unhealthy food ever for the week, hands down (and a hefty price but it was worth everything), brownie + ice cream being the most gorgeous sinful thing ever
Was it last year that we last met up? But whatever it is, you've been really great friend be it in primary school, noobish sec 2 days or the transient JC period
Nineteen ; here's to determination, no procrastination, reduced k dramas and reduced weight gain, and for dreams to turn into reality
xx
Happy birthday Paige!!
• table manners was really cute and we were talking about timbre when I heard live music playing from outside the cafe when we walked out; amazing how changi city point manages to fit cool things into one accessible area
• best unhealthy food ever for the week, hands down (and a hefty price but it was worth everything), brownie + ice cream being the most gorgeous sinful thing ever
Was it last year that we last met up? But whatever it is, you've been really great friend be it in primary school, noobish sec 2 days or the transient JC period
Nineteen ; here's to determination, no procrastination, reduced k dramas and reduced weight gain, and for dreams to turn into reality
xx
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Healthy food starts here / late nights stop
Cheap tricks amused us today;
21 Jan Happy Birthday Paige
22 Jan Happy Birthday Aerilynn
Ok latest I've ever slept!!!
Today Student A spontaneously went in front of the class to do his cha-cha when the English teacher asked them what rock and roll was; and the smile and good-natured, young enthusiasm really placed a smile on my face
Student B figured out place values for Math and when he found out he had the right answer, so did the rest of the class who cheered for him. He too pumped his fist into the air and might I add he has a china accent so +10 for cuteness
One moment I feel like I'm spending lots and the next moment it seems like I'm really not
21 Jan Happy Birthday Paige
22 Jan Happy Birthday Aerilynn
Ok latest I've ever slept!!!
Today Student A spontaneously went in front of the class to do his cha-cha when the English teacher asked them what rock and roll was; and the smile and good-natured, young enthusiasm really placed a smile on my face
Student B figured out place values for Math and when he found out he had the right answer, so did the rest of the class who cheered for him. He too pumped his fist into the air and might I add he has a china accent so +10 for cuteness
One moment I feel like I'm spending lots and the next moment it seems like I'm really not
Friday, January 18, 2013
/another friday/
It's like I'm shunning all opportunities to be happy. Or is that just me all the time?
So in an climatic turn of events, teacher becomes nice and unexaggeratedly life takes a turn for the better, nothing like what I'd felt just a week ago. Thanks though for everyone who cared. ❤
I feel like now I can see what I wake up for even though it's crazy early. Ellie Goulding and Coldplay keep my mind off the stressful things, though. And hopefully hopefully gym sessions w hweem works out!! (Pun intended)
I'm going to figure some shit out. And get some shut eye ASAP. To go for huge risk of specializing or go to the safer road of taking general degree?? All I know is that I want to help people haha as if that isn't vague enough. Then again it's true what H said, that life would suck if you spent it all researching and at the end of it all you've discovered nothing. I need to help the kids. Yet I don't want my heart to be hardened by many many years of conformity and begin to get impatient with them and treating them like they're rid of their mental disabilities. I think they deserve more??? There must be somethingggggggg
Other than dreaming of becoming an American Idol judge or setting up a YouTube account, getting discovered and then be whisked away to Hollywood to open up an act for someone famous. Wtv it is success ain't gonna come easy
......
So in an climatic turn of events, teacher becomes nice and unexaggeratedly life takes a turn for the better, nothing like what I'd felt just a week ago. Thanks though for everyone who cared. ❤
I feel like now I can see what I wake up for even though it's crazy early. Ellie Goulding and Coldplay keep my mind off the stressful things, though. And hopefully hopefully gym sessions w hweem works out!! (Pun intended)
I'm going to figure some shit out. And get some shut eye ASAP. To go for huge risk of specializing or go to the safer road of taking general degree?? All I know is that I want to help people haha as if that isn't vague enough. Then again it's true what H said, that life would suck if you spent it all researching and at the end of it all you've discovered nothing. I need to help the kids. Yet I don't want my heart to be hardened by many many years of conformity and begin to get impatient with them and treating them like they're rid of their mental disabilities. I think they deserve more??? There must be somethingggggggg
Other than dreaming of becoming an American Idol judge or setting up a YouTube account, getting discovered and then be whisked away to Hollywood to open up an act for someone famous. Wtv it is success ain't gonna come easy
......
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Phew
Super relieving to see an almost (key word being almost) 180deg change in personality and it makes the experience 45deg better ☺☺☺
Spontaneous visit to Goon's turf Serangoon and unlocked lotsa memories of JC last night!! And 20% sale at Guardian heeh
Spontaneous visit to Goon's turf Serangoon and unlocked lotsa memories of JC last night!! And 20% sale at Guardian heeh
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