stormy.

probably the worst i've ever felt.
can't./

i quite actually look forward to the end of things, but what i'll miss most is definitely the company and the accomplishment of after a long day's work. feelgoodfactor x 100/
even til now, i doubt my abilities so so so much. i really can't face up to the truth, it always seem that i'm trying but ain't up to your expectations. there's always the tinge of disappointment and anger imbued in me and so so so so much thoughts i really cannot go on i feel like such sh*t i could've done much better and avoided all these conflicts. i was always afraid of you. always have been but i can't believe i give in to that at the expense of everyone. i guess i'm only glad it's ending soon because i get to escape the stress that's been keeping a hold on me for so so so so long. maybe i'm in a state of maniacal depression there's a hellotta war going on in my head.
hm, i will constantly tell myself that menial thoughts will not get a hold of me. maybe i need help maybe i should call a friend maybe your problems are bigger maybe it'll all get better or worse. why did you pick me,///// i'm falling apart. rahh, feel quite terrib.
the top eight draw is really a challenge. and there's a whole lot of 'realistically speaking'. but that doesn't mean the fight should be withheld.
rj/hci/sa.

and days prior to this will look up, p+sitive.