there's the good memory of j2 life, way back before the pains of a levels really strikes a chord in our hearts with terror and alarm. friends, inside jokes and most importantly, zero responsibilities to bear. omg i really love love love that. no one whom you owe your knowledge and abilities to; no one to depend on you because you are the lone fighter who is fighting for your future. and no adult fare. i miss all of that. even though tj was a downright hell hole in the middle of the bushes. everything was kinda dreary but then there is the walking to the sports complex every morning before pe, laughing at inside jokes with jas or hazel, getting inspired by jodi, the works. gp class at the third level sometimes when i know it was the peak of slack, scuffling to the back row because you know you can do other stuff without worries.
j2 without the responsibilities would actually have been a dream. although i really hope uni would be a whole different ball game.
anyway, i was a lil bit wimpy today at the toilet hahah. maybe i will look back and um, be glad that this will soon pass. i don't know when exactly i will wake up again, without that constant fear in me....? can't help but.
thanks dee for your really encouraging messages during lunch and beyond. and hweemin fion ivy qiuxuan audrey huiling sam for the listening ear and laughing with me so i can at least be happy a lil bit, too.
sleeping at 10pm daily just because.//
thank god also for the comfort of family, like how my dad's always got my back since 1994 when i always have some impossible situation which he will always help me magically pull through like this morning when i needed timetables urgently, and how i know my mom will always be encouraging whenever i want to quit something i haven't quite yet finished. which will inevitably make me feel worse hah
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