1. i usually wouldve beaten myself over not going out w the friends for brunch, so this is a bold step for me- choosing to stay home bc i felt drained of energy from ytd, and making myself a srsly amazing big glass cup of beautimous TEA PARFAIT 

ヾ(＠⌒ー⌒＠)ノ

i felt terrible about not going to be a good host, but then i realized i cant be a prisoner of my own thoughts and my own expectations. i dont need to force myself to do something i dont want, instead, i have the agency to choose my own path and this morning, it includes staying home for this ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ

everyone acts in their own best interest and there's nothing wrong with that. i have acted in my own interest, and theres nothing wrong with that. 

i have to slowly accept and be really, really happy with the choices i make and this is it!!!!!

2. it was nice seeing everyone dress up to the nines yesterday at the dnd; and i got to eat vegetarian thanks to zhits,

and the familiar company made it very much enjoyable （＾ω＾）

i am grateful for the people that stick by me, and the warmness everyone exudes

3. my whatsapp to my aunty made me realize how much love ive yet to give to my family, and the extent to which i held back giving this love. in it, she told me how my cutie 10y/o cousin loved to hang out w his other cousins but doesnt want to say it. this made me think of how much ive missed in all of my cousins' lives. not just him, all 7 of them

but being here in oz, this whole experience has given me life lessons i never had. eg i've learnt to accept myself for my imperfections and to support myself in wtv decisions i make for myself. i made myself go through with my intended plans instead of sabotaging myself, i have learnt to read the labels and avoid foods that harm me- all for self-acceptance. i direly needed this experience and thank god i've finally learned to move on from my past self, bc idk what would happen if i kept hurting myself like that.